Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Epic Story Time

         True story of today, in the second person. I know ya'll said you want pictures more, I'll post more after.

           He will buy a mansion. It’s raining today, and it hasn’t rained in months. This is his first time playing the lottery, and the ticket sits folded and neglected on an oak dresser in the corner of his bedroom.  It had become apparent to him that furiously sweeping the bar on the ticket would not work until it would activate two days after he purchased the ticket at the Safeway a few blocks from his home. He had driven home in his green, paint chipped and equally neglected car with the nonchalant demeanor of “It’s ok, I can wait two days.”
            He will buy a Ferrari.  Two days later, he gets to the Safeway at 7:30pm, and after marching to the scanner it further denies him a prize. It had become equally apparent he would need to wait until 8pm to claim any potential jackpots. He scurries to the Starbuck’s stand a few meters away and order the Grande Frap he knows he can soon afford.  He scurried out of the Safeway into the safety of his car. He sits in the idle car as David Brubeck plays a tune on NPR; it isn’t Take Five, but he knows it is Brubeck.  He opens his eyes after the song finishes. 9:59pm. Cruelest of moments in his life, and although normally patient he could swear he was watching paint dry, ice melt, his vitality whither. He decides he will figure out who my true friends are once he is am wealthy.  It is 8pm.
            He will buy a yacht. The artificial illumination is exceptionally bright, and what sounds like elevator music is gracing his ears, the smell of fruit dances near the checkouts.  The neglected ticket is now my prizefighter, champion of what he deserves and has earned. The four small children putting pennies in the CoinStar gaze upwards in awe as he exchanges a look at his ticket, the air conditioned grocery pushing some moisture off his brow. The ticket is swiped, and there is an electronic beep.
           He slowly paced to his car, still shaking from the excitement. Jesus tapdancing Christ. I lost The Game.

Sorry loyal readers, lost $1 on the Lotto today and I thought I'd have you share my pain. Plus it's been a while since you've lost The Game. 

25 comments:

  1. im going to come back here often...keep it up

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  2. every $1 i spent on the lotto has been lost :( all $2 of it :(

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  3. Yeah, I spent 3$ one 3x $1 tickets, one won me $2, so I'm down a buck also. Worth writing a story about!

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  4. I love that story! Are you going to write more?

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  5. Wow that's amazing!

    Supporting and following bro.

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  6. This is a very well-composed piece of writing. I too am a creative writer of sorts, and I have decided to follow your blog.

    I have a blog as well, which you can follow if you're interested. It's the life story of a badass, modern Pecos-Bill-type character told in daily vignettes. I'm looking for actual readers, rather than just clickers/supporters, so if anyone's interested, feel free to take a look. =)

    http://tornadojackson.blogspot.com/

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  7. Thanks Jackson, I'll definitely be browsing.

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  8. FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU. Though I must say that it was clever. And I've somehow managed to break even to slight profit on lottery tickets. Suppose it is the luck of the draw. Though losing is always disappointing when you could have won the $50,000,000 jackpot.

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  9. Glad you enjoyed(and raged a bit James. I got a few tickets from a cousin 3 years ago for my 18th birthday and got $20, so I'd say I'm about $16 ahead of the system.

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  10. haha damn you!!! and sucks about your losing the buck

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  11. that sux, epic though, but still sux

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  12. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  13. Good thing I scrolled down before I read and saw those two words, 2/10

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  14. I know your pain, I hate losing money. : (

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  15. cool post!!
    i like your blog
    supportin & follow you bro!;)

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  16. He will buy a yacht. The artificial illumination is exceptionally bright, and what sounds like elevator music is gracing his ears, the smell of fruit dances near the checkouts.
    This is a very well-composed piece of writing. I too am a creative writer of sorts, and I have decided to follow your blog.

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